Asking a man about dating is a lot like asking him how well he can drive.  Just about every man who has ever dated for several years thinks he is an expert.  Interestingly, quite a few have even cashed in on their conquests and written books on how to be a dating success.  Just search ‘dating book’ or ‘dating secrets’ to get an idea on what is out there.

Sure, some of these books and DVD’s will actually give you a boost if your love life has been on a bit of a lean streak lately.  But before handing over some hard earned cash on these help guides, why not start with a few basic hints for that first date that you can get for free. 

Just remember before we start though – you shouldn’t generalize about women.  All women are different and each woman needs to be treated as an individual.  Any theory about how to treat women can only be a general guideline and not a rigid road-map to success.

Let Her Talk About Herself

We live in an age of equality but that does not mean that you can treat your date like a buddy you are having a beer with.  Women love good manners and the more you display, the more she will respect you. 

Any relationship must be a 50:50 partnership if it is to have any chance of success. Let her talk about herself as much as you talk about yourself.  Let her know that what interests her also interests you as you and your date need to have things in common.  But don’t expect to have identical tastes – that will be like dating a mirror.  If she’s interested in things you know nothing about, be honest about it and ask her to tell you more.  She will love it. Pretending to be an expert where you are not will make you look like an idiot.

Create That First Impression

Don’t kill the romance before it can get started.  Your first date is not like turning up to a party … make sure you are on time or just a few minutes late.  Don’t be early – that could appear just a little desperate.  And if you are going to be more than a few minutes late, give her a quick call to let her know you are not standing her up – it’s just common courtesy.  Something like “hey, I am stuck in traffic and will be 15 minutes late”.  Being late will create the impression that you are not taking the date seriously.  Once she thinks that, she won’t take you seriously. 

Some Old Fashioned Values

To bring flowers or not?  The jury is out on this one.  If you are middle-aged and dating in small town, then flowers might be a nice touch.  Flowers for a 20-something dating a modern woman?  Probably not a great first impression.  It might show you are interested, or it could just just be an awkward moment.  If you don’t know her that well yet, why take the risk?

What all women do enjoy though is a man with a sense of humor.  Do your best to make your date laugh and smile.  If you feel comfortable, even tease her a little to create some sexual tension.  Many men attempt to impress girls by talking about their jobs; that’s not a great idea.  Just tell her what you do and stop talking.  If she is genuinely interested, she will ask more.  If not, talking about it will just bore her and she will lose interest.  To start with, keep you answers short and to the point without making it appear that you are trying to hide something.  And be truthful about what you do.

No one is perfect and you WILL screw up at times, but that is part of the learning curve.  Just  treat her like a person and not a sex object, she will forgive you and you can easily recover from your mistakes.